Why Some Bands Suck More Than Others

Some bands suck. Some bands suck more than others.

Some bands have a lot of haters. Some bands deserve every single one of these haters they have.

Absolutepunk.net tends to be pretty opinionated about what bands they hate.  They particularly hold a grudge against the genre they have dubbed "emo crunk".

Here is a list of four bands who's success they frown upon the most, in order of least-deserving-of-hatred to most deserving.

1) NeverShoutNever!

Now I enjoy NeverShoutNever! but that isn't the only reason why I'm defending him. First of all, he doesn't belong to the most hated of genres amongst the old school scene: emo crunk. It appears he is hated for being an adorable ukelele loving, auto-tune using simpleton.

Yeah, a lot of his success is probably due to that precious face. And yes, the ukelele has become a gimmack in the scene. But is he really deserving of hatred? His music is harmless. Maybe it's annoying to some, but it's not painful. His lyrics are sweet and simple. The largest consequence of his popularity are the fangirls.  It's not like they aren't already crazy fangirls for other bands.

2) 3OH!3

Okay, yeah I like them too.  But like Twilight, I admit they're not what I'd call good. They have the emo crunk thing everyone seems to hate, but a lot of it is pretty much tongue-in-cheek, which raises their respectability in my book. However, there have been dire consequences due to their growing mainstream popularity.  Two of the worst consequences can be seen below.

3) Millionaires

Excuse me while I vomit, I just had to google image search the Millionaires.

When news of their signing (that I'd rather not discuss because it makes my heart hurt and my brain throb) hit, I mistakenly decided to preview their songs on Amazon to see if they were really as bad as I remembered.  I couldn't even complete one 30 second preview. Not only is their so-called "music" nothing but a loop on Garage Band, but their lyrics have destroyed every effort of woman trying to earn respect in the music scene.  Their newest EP is titled "Just Got Paid, Let's Get Laid". Ew.

They deserve the hate because not only are they a poor excuse for music, but they are a poor excuse for women. I'm not saying that women shouldn't be sexually liberated or shouldn't talk about drinking. I'm saying they shouldn't sing about wanting to be date-raped.  Is that too much to ask?

4) BrokenCYDE

Arguably the most hated band of what's considered the scene, and well-deserved of their title.

It's been said in ways better than I ever could, but BrokenCYDE's attempt at mixing genres is a fail of epic proportions. Bad synths, pig-squealing screams, and revolting lyrics. Even bands that have been unfortunate enough to tour with them denounce them.

But definitely the worst thing is the lyrics. Millionaires's lyrics are bad enough, but what's worse is that BrokenCYDE writes about drugging girls' drinks and then having sex with them. Also known as rape.  And young girls listen to this and for the most part, have no problem with it. And BrokenCYDE doesn't seem to be bothered by letting underage girls expose themselves. All of this is not okay.

Hence, they deserve to be hated.